Into The Black Tides Tuesdays: Groaza

Welcome, my paranoid poltergeists, to another edition of Into the Black Tides Tuesdays! That’s right, the one time of the week where you get to sit back, eat candy-coated moth balls and learn about all things Into the Black Tides. What a time to be alive!

Let’s dive right into things, shall we? This week we’re going to be tackling the groaza race and all things rock-related when it comes to these guardian gargoyles.

As Loyal As a Dog, As Efficient As a Cog

The first thing most people think of when they think of gargoyles is statues of vicious, winged beasts that come alive to make fun of and kill you – sometimes at the same time! With the groaza, you’d pretty much be right. Except they’re always alive and they aren’t made of stone – not technically, at least. The groaza can cover their entire body in stone as a sort of defense mechanism, but the squishy, fleshy part is still there underneath.

It’s kind of like fighting a winged coconut – crack it the right way and see all the liquid come running out! But don’t expect it to be an easy task. That armor’s as hard as, well, stone.

Tough as onyx and as gentle as a territorial cat, this race serves as guardians to the varothan. Though, they have been known to also protect and watch over those that they travel with, which just might come in handy – after all, the best defense is a 2 ton, rock-clad fiend that can shoot fireballs with the snap of its fingers!

Creeper Status

Speaking of “watching over,” did we mention that the groaza are always watching? Always. It’s kind of their thing! Now, I know that sounds incredibly creepy, and you’re kind of right – but don’t overthink it. They’re really no different than old Fido lying by your side at night, keeping an eye out for anything amiss. As long as you don’t mind a statue brooding over your bedroll, that is.

Anyways, who’s going to expect a statue to come to life and beat them to death the moment they try to sneak up and attack you? Which reminds me, if you’ve got a statue in your room that you didn’t put there, you may want to get that checked – especially if you keep hearing sneezing and you have no idea where it came from. Groaza have allergies too, after all. Get up and do some dusting!

Illustrated by Vincent Baker 

Illustrated by Vincent Baker 

Onyx, Obsidian, and Granite, Oh My!

Groaza come in a variety of different flavors – yes, flavors. I’m sure we’ve all licked a few rocks before. Tell me that Granite and Onyx don’t taste different. Anyways, with the different flavors to choose from, it’ll be hard to narrow in on exactly which groaza you’ll want to play. Thankfully, we here at Vindicated Entertainment encourage difficulty in choices and will kick back and watch as you devolve into chaos while trying to pick.

But really, it all comes down to your playstyle. Want to be more agile and evade attacks? Pickgranite. Want to be a heavy hitter and tank blows? Pick obsidian. Regardless of how you’re thinking about running into the fight, you really can’t go wrong with the groaza. Plus, you can fly. Who doesn’t love flying?

Stop, Drop & Roll

That’s all the time we have for this week’s Into the Black Tides Tuesdays! I’m sure by now you’ve got it marked down on your calendar and have drawn hearts all around it. But, if not, make sure you get on that so you don’t miss an update.

While you’re at it, since we know that you love hearing from us, subscribe to our newsletter so that we can deliver our updates straight to your inbox! Nothing says “I love you” like a handwritten note from us to all of you.

Until next time, Franken-friends,


Wait, you missed our last Into The Black Tides Tuesdays? Check it out below! 

Into The Black Tides Tuesdays: Homunculus

Edited by Abby Edwards

Vincent Baker

Hello! The name is Vincent Baker and I'm a game designer. I love video games, but my heart is in tabletop games .I've created Otherworlds and Spellslingers.

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